Proverbs 31 Wife and a Proverbial Noble Husband

A while back...a long while back I found this post. And I thought it was really great about what good Christian men need in a wife. I wanted to share, not only for anyone out there who might need this but also for me as a reference.

For those who don't even know what a Proverbs 31 wife/woman is, here is the passage.

Proverbs 31:10-31 (NIV)
A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

When I don't fully understand something I always turn to The Message version, so here is the message version. A lot of it is still translated into something that we women can't uphold in the 21st century, but it better explains parts of it.

Proverbs 31:10-31 (The Message)
A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it. Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing. She's like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises. She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,  rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking. She's quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor. She doesn't worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks. Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers. She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops. Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise: "Many women have done wonderful things, but you've outclassed them all!" Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises!

Now this passage gets abused a lot, and I've met plenty of men who won't even consider a girl unless she is Proverbs 31 quality. Honestly, I strive to be a Proverbs 31 woman, albeit a modern one. And I believe it's a great passage for men to look up to when trying to find that woman God wants for them.

Here is how we can be Proverbs 31 women, and what Christian single men need:

1. Christian men needs to have confidence in his girl of a lifetime. This means he can share his heart (this is difficult for many men because of their fears) without worry about gossip or rejection. The male ego is fragile.
2. Christian men needs his woman to bring him good and not harm...in good times and bad. Some women are able to "love their man" when the going is easy. But how about when the hard knocks of life (and there will be some) start rolling through?
3. Christian men would profit by having a woman who can happily and wisely take good care of the household. By the way, it looks like Solomon would disagree with all those guys who think their wives need to be "barefoot and pregnant at home."
4. Christian men (men in general) can sometimes be insensitive to the needs of others' pain. So a guy who has a woman who is compassionate and loving to the less fortunate can help him grow in this area.
5. Christian men need a wife who takes good care of the marriage bed (you know what Solomon means here, right?), as well as her own personal appearance. Outward beauty can be deceitful, but Christian men (or any man) respects a woman who respects herself by looking as good as she can be.
6. Christian men need a strong and independent woman. A man loves to feel needed by his woman because it fulfills his need to provide. But very few single Christian men are attracted to high maintence whiny types.
7. Christian men need a woman who can laugh at whatever life brings. Life is hard enough without a good sense of humor and positive outlook. This is especially helpful for men because circumstances can get the best of men a little down.
8. Christian men need a woman who can give wise advice and timely counsel. "Behind every great man is a great woman."

Now that's great, but a man needs to keep his end of the bargain too.

Proverbial Man of Noble Character

• Reprove a wise man and he will love you. Proverbs 9:8
• Give instruction to a wise man and he will be still wiser, Teach a righteous man and he will increase his learning. Proverbs 9:9
• The generous man will be prosperous, And he who waters will himself be watered. Proverbs 11:25
• A good man will obtain favor from the LORD. Proverbs 12:2
• A wise man is he who listens to counsel. Proverbs 12:15
• A prudent man overlooks an insult. Proverbs 12:16
• Every prudent man acts with knowledge. Proverbs 13:16
• He who walks with wise men will be wise. Proverbs 13:20
• A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children. Proverbs 13:22
• The sensible man considers his steps. Proverbs 14:15
• A wise man is cautious and turns away from evil. Proverbs 14:16
• He who is slow to anger has great understanding. Proverbs 14:29
• A man of understanding walks straight. Proverbs 15:21
• What is desirable in a man is his kindness. Proverbs 19:22
• A righteous man who walks in his integrity-- How blessed are his sons after him. Proverbs 20:7
• A wise man scales the city of the mighty And brings down the stronghold in which they trust. Proverbs 21:22
• A wise man is strong, And a man of knowledge increases power. Proverbs 24:5
• For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again, But the wicked stumble in time of calamity. Proverbs 24:16

Do I know what all that means...absolutely not. But there's a book called In Search of the Proverbs 31 Man – by Michelle McKinney Hammond, that I plan to read soon and it'll help.

I also plan on finding out more information about being a modern day Proverbs 31 woman and I will share that too. But for now, my sole focus is being 100% fully devoted and in love with my Lord.